To all you people who dont comment., but ask questions over email: well., I was there and through it. And am DONE. Well., yeah.. the phone thing did break my heart and i looked up at the heavens and screamed., but I definitely did not sing a song.
Yesterday turned out to be an unexpected long night. (huh!! when did it ever happen expected). Started with beer, then more beer, then more beer and some whiskey :) Well., um.. the occassion happened to be the ripping off a friend of his stinking fridge and setting it up as a small bar in the office. :) Yesterday evening it was full., now its empty. :)
In the middle of this alcohol mayhem., some one calls after more than a month. Ah excuses., excuses. heh.. gawd., I hate excuses. This significant caller reminded me of those old days when I was back in college. The days when I was this hopeless romantic, dreaming with one small picture of my gf (yeah loser.. me..)., waiting for the postman for the once in two days letter (er.. email was difficult. logistics problems.. dont ask)., waiting on the road to get a glimpse of her when her dad drops her at college., etc..
I was thinking, whether I would whole-heartedly and spontaneously be the same person I was., to another woman., ever again? Or whether that 'love is bliss' types hopeless romatic thing was just a phase. And if I'm not able to give that 'hopeless romantic' type of a relationship to this woman with whom i'll eventually end up with., would I be an assole? The more of this broken-hearted-endings shit., the more I find myself skeptic and thinking. What if one day I become this paranoid fcker., scared to let anybody into my head because I'm scared of the consequences.
Arghh.. why did i get sober.